Bias?

After doing casual relief teaching in another school for the past 3 days, I began to miss my A Maths students that I have taught for the past 1 – 2 months more. I began to have snapshots of me interacting with my A Maths students (especially my ex form class students) in their school canteen staying afloat in my mind when I sat down in the canteen of another school during my break time. Worst of all,I have a strong urge to teach these A Maths students again even though I was being called up by another school.  In addition, I began to realise that I will keep counting down to school dismissal time when I was performing my duty in another school which seems to be a different me when I was teaching A Maths 1- 2 months ago.

In any case, I found myself fortunate to be able to perform the role of being relief teacher till now though there are many people still on the waiting list. Thus, I shall not grumble here since those beautiful moments are already over. Well, let me wait for schools to call me tomorrow. 🙂

Proposed changes in education system

In this entry, I shall reflect on my role of being E Maths teacher for the past 3 weeks. During my tenure, I have tried to interest the weaker students in E Maths and allow them to appreciate how Maths is applied in daily life. I hope that I have convinced them that Maths is not a memory subject. In fact, students should not memorise mathematical formulae. They should use their ‘nonsensical’ reasoning to memorise daunting formulae. They must know how to appreciate mathematical formulae (i.e. the essence of the variables used, limitation of the formulae) If not, they would be easily deceived by the exam questions.  Although I could not garner full support from all students, I am elated to see that I have managed to convince some students. In addition, I have tried to show the connection between E Maths and A Maths in some E Maths topics during E Maths lesson for those students who are studying A Maths. In this way, I hope that they know the real purpose of doing A Maths which pride should not be in their dictionaries at all. In any case, I have just relinquished my permanent relief teaching appointment since there is no demand for me.:(

Fortunately, I was given the opportunity to perform casual relief in the same school today. This allows me to see the plight of NT teachers. While I was performing the duty of a relief teacher for these NT classes, I began to see the importance of small class size – 20 students vs 40 students in a NT class. For me, I could not control a chaotic NT class of 40 students since there are simply too many dispersed groups of students messing the class. In contrast, I have managed to control a NT class of 20 students since it is easier for me to keep a look out when they spark off a pandemonium. If I have given a chance to write an essay on the desired changes that I would like to see in the future education system, I would like the MOE to allocate an average of 20 students in every NT class. In my perspective, the NT students in secondary school have a different perspectives towards life and tend to be rowdy (worst than my time). For instance, they feel satisfied when they managed to piss the teacher off or they would use the table as their drum as they feel that lion dance is cool. Thus, it would give more time for teacher to spend more time on quality teaching with them since less people means less discipline problems. Moreover, I would like to propose MOE hiring more teachers that could tackle the NT students. In my perspective, I feel that there are not a lot of teachers who could teach NT students as we do not possess the aura  to discipline them. In this way, we could allow the mainstream teachers to teach the students in other streams. However, this does not mean that NT teachers should be despised. In fact, they are silent heros who have not been recognised by the society. Similarly, I have never look down on the NT students. Although they may be rowdy in school, they are the ones who feel appreciative of teachers and less centered than students in the other streams. The intention of proposing a change in the education system for the NT students is that we should meet the requirement of them since they have different needs which has not been focused by the society these days.

What if…

In this entry, I would like to give kudos to some people that have touched my life in the past few years.  Without them, I guess I would not be able to meet the students that I have taught now.

Firstly, I would like to express sincere thanks to my English teacher who has taught me during Sec 4. She is indeed a passionate teacher who would fought all out for the benefits of the students. This could be exemplified from the fact that she quibbled with the higher management personnel in my alma mater to allow the conduct of her English lessons in the AVA room which was only allowed to be used for organisation of other external events. In addition, she has even volunteered to mark my essays and comprehension daily after the prelim exams as she believes in me that I could make the mark. Moreover, she has even entrusted me to teach her daughter Elementary Maths during my JC1 days even though my maths is not as impeccable as she used to think. As a result, I began to embark on my tutoring career as a source of personal income and create my own teaching style for Maths (I guess my students could vouch for that, haha). Most importantly, she has even provided me with a GP tutor when I told her I need GP tuition badly as my GP grades were not performing back then.

Secondly, I would like to thank my PE teacher during my JC2 days as he kept reminding me the existence of 2 months reduction in NS if I could obtain Silver or Gold for my NAPFA test. At that point of time, I felt that this goal is unattainable as I have never been able to pull myself for chin up ever since this component was introduced in my NAPFA test in Sec 3. After listening to my PE teacher’s sharing on the benefits of 2 months reduction in NS (which I have personally taste it now) and how to train for chin up, I began to coerce myself to start on the regimental training. That is, I would ‘attack’ the chin up bar upon reaching school and leaving the school daily as well as visiting the gym in every alternate days. In view of this, I began to obtain 9 chin up after 2 months of training despite the fact that I was indeed disheartened to pull myself up the chin up bar for 2 weeks.

In conclusion, I am indeed grateful that I have managed to encounter these teachers in my life. Without them, I would not have been a relief teacher for the past 2 months as my official ORD (for 2 years of NS)  is yesterday (11 04 09). This 2 months of early release from NS drudgery  has been a fruitful experience for me as I have tasted the life of being a teacher (which is not easy as many people think).  In a tribute of my past teachers’ effort, I hope that I have done likewise by inspiring my students in various ways. I guess this would be the best gift that I could give to my fellow teachers. 🙂

Evil side of me?

Let me quote a phrase that one of my students has described about me. That is, I am a teacher who could be easily bullied. This phrase keeps me smirking when I heard that from the mouth of my student. Although he or she is not wrong to say that I am easily bullied as I have been easygoing to them, they have failed to see the devil side of me. In the first place, I have never wanted to be fierce to my students unless they have offended me (which cannot be forgiven) or doing unjustified things. In my belief, they are still in the growing years. Thus, they should be given ample time to amend their flaws if they have.

In contrast, I could not stop myself to reveal the evil side of me when I was rushing to the western side of Singapore to get a home printer for myself where there is electronics warehouse sale going on. I was initially elated for the fact that I have managed to get a monochrome laser printer at a price of $68 (with a toner that could print 2,500 pages). While queuing, I have realised that I wasn’t given trolley for the bulky printer as I saw one of the customers was issued with a trolley even though her printer is more costly than I do. At this juncture, I began to realise that I could not carry the printer home if I am not given the trolley since I am not taking a cab back home. Thus, I requested for a trolley for the printer from one of the staff in the counter politely as I will be carrying the printer home via public transport. Yet, he told me to get the trolley from the printer section. Upon reaching the printer section, the sales lady told me that the trolley is given to the customer who has brought printer that is beyond $300. At that moment, I was enraged as her words are too deregatory. In the first place, I wouldn’t have to rush down to this warehouse sale if I am indeed rich. She is not even in the position to say such a thing as it is customer’s choice to buy the item he or she likes. If she finds that the product is too cheap or demean the actual value of the product, her company should not have sold us at that price. Despite this, I insist in explaining my situation to her that I could only carry home this printer to my house at Hougang by myself via public transport. Yet, she told me off that one of her customers could carry the printer home even though she lives in Pasir Ris. At that spur of moment, I was indeed pissed off and thus chided her. I told her off that she could have carried this printer without the trolley as there is someone sending her home via car or she could have taken a cab. In my case, I will only carry this printer home using public transport even though it is inconvenient.  In addition, I have told her that the company should not have given trolley based on the value of the printer. They should consider giving it to customers who really needs it (e.g. my case). If they have experienced shortage of trollies, they should give to the customers who requests for it when they have brought their printers.  If not, they are simply despising customers who buy the $68 printer. After the long scolding, the saleslady asked me to chill down. Fortunately, her supervisior passed by. He tasked them to give me the trolley. Does it mean that I need to scold them in order to make things happen?

Well, I do admit that I do not come from wealthy family. Yet, this does not give them the right to despise my family background. I have paid for the printer using the money that I have earned from the jobs that I have done with my own hand and effort. In fact, I was forced to learn the importance of money when I was born in a lower income family. If not, I will not have shrimped my money to bring the printer home via public transport. I could have taken a cab to save the time and effort.

Thus, a question arises. When is it possible for Singapore to balance between being realistic and considerate for others?

Is teaching my true profession?

In this week, I have been giving serious thought if I should really enter the teaching force in future.

In my perspective, I feel that teaching in  a secondary school is a fulfilling job for me as I love to interact students in their teen years. That is why I am willing to stay back in school to give free consultation or share with them my stories in hopeful that I could spur them to work hard for their studies. Well, the current relief teaching experience has enlightened me that there are days where the passion for teaching will fall drastically over time. However, I realise that my passion for teaching will be rejuvenated when I step in to class to see my students awaiting for me to impart them with the knowledge. This could be exemplified from the fact that I was indeed tired for the earlier part of the day when I came to school. I even dragged my feet to the class. Ironically, I began to feel refreshed (after incessant sweating while teaching students?) when I began to impart the Mathematical knowledge to my students. In view of this trend, I could fathom why I did not feel so fatigue when I was teaching A Maths in my previous assignment  even though the timetable was so packed.

In addition, I have been asking for candour feedbacks from my students with regards to my teaching style. Sadly to say, I have heard feedback like I am too animated instead of being able to impart knowledge. To be frank, this comment has been deeply ingrained in my heart which has dwindled my passion of teaching for the past 3 days. Worst of all, I felt that my teaching style for the past 3 days is substandard which I feel unjustified to them. Thus,  I began to proach myself for not being a good teacher for these students. In fact, I have been doing self reflection and pondering on ways to meet their requirements.

On a flipside, I have managed to win the heart of a student who used to detest me when I first came to teach him. To my surprise, he began to listen to my lessons even though he used to make snide remarks about me in class.

In view of all these incidents, I have a dilemma on whether I should be a teachers by profession in future especially when I could not control a nortorious Normal Technical class on Tuesday. 

A puzzle remains unsolved….

Disappointment

In this entry, I shall voice out my ‘grievances’ after given the relief duty of baby sitting one of the Sec 2 Express class for one lesson (thank god). First of all, they are rowdy which I could bear with since I am not their teacher. In fact, I have lowered my noise expectation level and given them the freedom to do things. Yet, some of them are running around the class, bullying their friends which have convinced me the severity of school bully issue discussed in the public. Although it is expected that Sec 2 students tend to be childish (if not I would have use the word puerile), they are simply up to my nerves. Their behaviour is a replica to the primary school kids. Worst of all, one student request for my pass to stroll around the school even though she keeps saying that she is in the toilet. Well, she doesn’t need to utilise the toilet for 30 mins, right? In addition, the guys were leaving the class and chat along the staircase outside their class.  Fortunately, I came from neighbourhood schools. My intuition tells me that I will need to deter these students. Thus, I manage to catch them personally. If they were in NA or NT stream, I would not have been so disappointed as I am prepared to anticipate that.

In view of this, I began to miss my Sec 4 students especially the A Maths students that I have taught. At the bear minimum, they have given me a basic respect that humans should be given recognition of.